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He woke me up.

This page of her diary, is not her life.
But the one, she wanted to have.
A life she dreamed of, but knew she'd never get.
It's a page in the middle of it.

I woke up this morning, with a call of (my crush).
His sweet voice, and sleepy eyes I could almost reach were so close.
That was because, he was next to me.
I had almost forget yesterday.
The day I hugged him for the first time in my whole life,
The day I saw him, heard his voice derictly through my ears and had the chance to kiss him. (although I didn't)
It felt like something so untrue that it had to be magic.
But I knew, that it wasn't.
It was real! It happend after so many days, wishing that I could finaly see him up close.
It started with the day that he said '' I want to see you in real '' .
I thought that he would never say that, maybe he would keep it in mind, but no never even dared to think about that.
That was because it was a wish of me.
I have always said: ''Dreams can become true, but wishes are things that will never happen in your whole life.''
I know that saying something like that is very depressed..
But it's just that I have always thought about it like that.
Although, yesterday have let me see that I was wrong.
He's still here, sitting next to me.
Luckly he can't read what I'm writing right now.
Otherwise I would be very embarrassed at the moment and the moments after this one, ofcourse.
It's still unthinkable that he is really next to me, watching tv without me knowing he likes the programme what we're watching.
His breath is just the same I always imagined, so dreamy and regular.. so.. so him.
It's really weird of me thinking about that and even writing it.
But he's just so fascinating, so real.. so next to me!
Unbelievable that I can just poke him for real, without something is between us or that we have to read it.
That he can hold me in his warm arms.. like I've alwaysed wished.
I made up so many stories about what could happen.. they all started like: '' What if '' .
What if he's at (a friend of mine)'s house and he was next to her when she called me.
Or what if he's behind me watching me how I'm walking with Chicco.
I knew that something like that would never happen, they were just made up by me.
But just meeting him was a big thing, it could maybe happen something I would never believe but it did.
Going back to this morning, he was in my bed and I in the one of my sister who I share my room with.
I often used to ask him to call me awake, but he never did.
That was because he had to wake up a hour earlier than that I did.
He didn't want to wake me up at that hour because of nothing.
I always said that I didn't care, I just wanted to wake up with his voice.
Although he didn't knew that, I was a bit angry with him.
I wanted it, but he didn't.
Leaving that behind me, he once called me when I was about to sleep.
I was happy that his voice was the last one I would hear that day.
I saw that day as the best day of my life.
That sight changed today though, he woke me up.

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Ik heb dingen verzonnen op de waarheid. Namen heb ik niet gebruikt.

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